So we’re just gonna walk around pretending it’s not weird that one of our hands is just worse at everything?
I’ve been twerking on the railroad
justintheallan: soycrates: endreal: avatar-addiction: nicotineenema: Shout out to girls who don’t mind being called dude and man casually shout out to boys who don’t mind being called guuurrl shout out to humans who don’t mind being called dawg shout out to dogs who will let you call them anything so long as you say it in a happy, friendly tone. Shout out to Guinea Pigs which...
superwhoavengelockandme: thetimetravelersguidetothegalaxy: katswhiskers: velvetonions: imagine a milkshake place called “shakesperience” where all the milkshake flavours are named after puns of shakespeare plays Oreothello Rolo and Juliet Macberry Mars Ado About Nothing Antonutella and Cleopatra Merchocolate of Venice Two Gentlemint of Verona Richerry III I would never be online...
reblog if you want anons but in reality no one is...
kenfucky: opening the fridge for the first time after someone went grocery shopping
alltimeangela: why does leonardo dicaprio always end up dead in the water with no girlfriend
jimbertimber: coming out to your parents by saying swiggity swag guess whos a fag
if a guy stares at ur boobs just stare at his dick maybe squint a little bit
mytoecold: A guy I don’t know very well handed me his yearbook and asked me if I wanted to sign it. I said yes, and shortly after he added, “Just don’t write anything gay.” I wrote this: Fuck my actual butthole. You are a boy and so am I. We are going to have sex that is gay. Pound my rock hard cock and bite me. Love, Drew
mycroft-queenofcake: iamjayse: thenerdfighterkid: slydig: tsarbucks: slydig: dont be mean be median or mode damn math fandom bloggers shut up we have a good range of jokes this is our domain guys we’re forgetting the point of this post and going off on a tangent
you-are-johnlocked: dftba-cumberbabe: primadonna-blaine: a-study-in-butts: thetwincores: asapmona: rhydonmyhardon: let us have a moment of silence for those who unknowingly dated and broke up with a future celebrity my math teacher dated Ryan Gosling in highschool. my neighbor dated bill nye the science guy well my godmother dated david tennant when they were 16 my friend’s...
twinkletwinkleyoulittlefuck: canderemy: excuse you
friendsofthegaybc: travisstolls: friendsofthegaybc: travisstolls: WHEN HE WAS A YOUNG WARTHOG WHEN I WAS A YOUNG WARTHOOOOOOOOG Very nice Thanks
quazza: i am reminded that english is a flawed language every time I am forced to use “that that” in a sentence
equisollux: zombiecthulu: basedkuroko: my friend is hiding under this bean bag in the library so he doesnt have to go to PE the only way you can see him is if you get on the floor behind the bean bag and see the light of his phone I bet he’s on Tumblr I am
badpeopleanonymous: variablejabberwocky: hypotheticalwoman: 3rdrudy: emerald-observance: 3rdrudy: imsarahcate: 3rdrudy: timewarp-grrrl: ‘what doesn’t kill you makes you stronger’ what if i cut off your left leg would that make you stronger would it Finally the Monty Python fandom awakens We were never asleep, we’ve just been out trying to find the...
discocitronnade: one time when i was a freshman the last bell for the end of seventh period rang and as i was walking out of world geography there was this guy that was SO HAPPY AND EXCITED i guess because it was friday and he ran directly towards the window and he just JUMPED OUT he JUMPED OUT OF THE WINDOW AND WE WERE ON THE THIRD FLOOR everybody looked out the window to see if he was ok and...
captorquest: inkwelldried: captorquest: any negative thing that can happen about yahoo buying tumblr is worth the “david karp daddy” jokes stopping how sure are you about that vomits on everything
sext: fist me like u tryna get the last couple pringles
hungarian: nowhere in the bible does it say god is not a burrito